The Facade...
Everyone wears a "face"... More often than not, we would try to read these faces, but we seldom succeed in getting the perfect reason, meaning and interpretation of the "face" one is wearing... Sometimes, we even get confused over dozens of indescribable "face" we encounter as we journey along this life. Most recently, I have had an alarming dilemma...
A group of friends were having a party in a yacht... Each of them may only invite 1 friend to join or more if some of them does not bring any as long as the total number of friends on board remains the same. I was invited to join this party one time, and me and the rest of the invited guests were so excited. It was my first time, not to some though. I was one of the youngest member of the team, so it's my time to get this party experience.
One day though, one of the organizers approached me and said, one has to let this party go since we have to make room for the "pilot". And if it's okay with me, she's asking it to be me, since even if it would have been my first time on this party, but I've just had a grand ballroom party so maybe I can let this pass for now. That is if it won't make me feel bad. And maybe if I will insist of joining, someone else is going to give this up and it would be another friend of mine, who this organizer said has never had experienced any party yet since his membership to the team. I don't want to be the cause of pain or irritation to someone else, so I said, it's okay with me, but you have to ask the one who invited me to let this pass, cause I'm just the invited, I don't make the rules.
So after a few days, then the party day came and indeed, I wasn't invited anymore, so I thought, maybe they have really took me out as a team, so I guess, maybe next time...
Almost a year passed and the organizers are pulling for another yacht party. And this time, I was taken by surprise... My team coach approached me and asked me why did I let last year's party go. It should not have been like that, and I don't have in any way, any right to decide for the team. That's when I knew, the coach did not know about what happened when somehow I assumed that the organizers spoke to the coach about their plan. Now what reached the coach is that, I made the decision, why the h*** would I? And why would someone tell the coach that I did? Someone asked me to be lonely, yet not feel bad on a party day to let someone else happy and now I'm the bad guy? What have I done to deserve this?
I was so surprised to hear what I heard. I felt bad after that talk, but I totally understand my coach's feelings about this. But there isn't anything I can do about it. I was definitely disappointed to the one who asked me about it. They should know in the first place that my opinion doesn't matter at all, whether I get in or not, it wasn't my decision, and as far as I'm concern, I did not make any! I just said, I won't feel bad, that if I don't get an invitation, I wouldn't be surprised. Moreover, later I found out, the reason told to me was not even true. It wasn't the person's first time, it was the second time. And now, I'm not so sure if I'll ever be invited at all ever again. Lastly, I felt betrayed, I was just doing what I should be doing, and trying to be good to everyone, yet, that isn't enough in this team. You need to be stepped on and dragged on an unending charade of hypocrisy, politics and power trips.
Lesson learned: Everyone wears a facade, so be careful...
A group of friends were having a party in a yacht... Each of them may only invite 1 friend to join or more if some of them does not bring any as long as the total number of friends on board remains the same. I was invited to join this party one time, and me and the rest of the invited guests were so excited. It was my first time, not to some though. I was one of the youngest member of the team, so it's my time to get this party experience.
One day though, one of the organizers approached me and said, one has to let this party go since we have to make room for the "pilot". And if it's okay with me, she's asking it to be me, since even if it would have been my first time on this party, but I've just had a grand ballroom party so maybe I can let this pass for now. That is if it won't make me feel bad. And maybe if I will insist of joining, someone else is going to give this up and it would be another friend of mine, who this organizer said has never had experienced any party yet since his membership to the team. I don't want to be the cause of pain or irritation to someone else, so I said, it's okay with me, but you have to ask the one who invited me to let this pass, cause I'm just the invited, I don't make the rules.
So after a few days, then the party day came and indeed, I wasn't invited anymore, so I thought, maybe they have really took me out as a team, so I guess, maybe next time...
Almost a year passed and the organizers are pulling for another yacht party. And this time, I was taken by surprise... My team coach approached me and asked me why did I let last year's party go. It should not have been like that, and I don't have in any way, any right to decide for the team. That's when I knew, the coach did not know about what happened when somehow I assumed that the organizers spoke to the coach about their plan. Now what reached the coach is that, I made the decision, why the h*** would I? And why would someone tell the coach that I did? Someone asked me to be lonely, yet not feel bad on a party day to let someone else happy and now I'm the bad guy? What have I done to deserve this?
I was so surprised to hear what I heard. I felt bad after that talk, but I totally understand my coach's feelings about this. But there isn't anything I can do about it. I was definitely disappointed to the one who asked me about it. They should know in the first place that my opinion doesn't matter at all, whether I get in or not, it wasn't my decision, and as far as I'm concern, I did not make any! I just said, I won't feel bad, that if I don't get an invitation, I wouldn't be surprised. Moreover, later I found out, the reason told to me was not even true. It wasn't the person's first time, it was the second time. And now, I'm not so sure if I'll ever be invited at all ever again. Lastly, I felt betrayed, I was just doing what I should be doing, and trying to be good to everyone, yet, that isn't enough in this team. You need to be stepped on and dragged on an unending charade of hypocrisy, politics and power trips.
Lesson learned: Everyone wears a facade, so be careful...
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